Thursday, March 31, 2011

Was Kenny Powers at the State St McDonald's last night?

Opening Day is tomorrow, so it has to be him right?

This pic reminds me of a couple of my favorite Kenny Powers' quotes:

"I'm the man who has the ball. I'm the man who can throw it faster than fuck. So that is why I am better than everyone in the world. Kiss my ass and suck my dick... everyone"

"Sure, I've been called a xenophobe, but the truth is, I'm not. I honestly just feel that America is the best country and the other countries aren't as good. That used to be called patriotism. "

"A lot of people ask me, 'Kenny Powers, you're a giant superstar. You can get any woman. Have you ever paid for sex?' And the answer is yes, I have. Several times, in fact. And it's actually kinda cool. You can negotiate practically anything and sometimes, even just kind of do stuff in the moment that you never agreed to pay for and it goes by without much argument."

"Alright, so let me get this straight. So I gotta pay for a blow job, and I gotta pay for a fuckin' hotel room too? Well that seems like I'm spending too much money for nothin' I got a house. You can just get your ass over and we could just do the blow job here. And can I wear the 'SCREAM' mask? The mask from 'SCREAM' while I do you from behind.  Hello? Hey?"

"So, in closing, I'd like to give big ups to God, Buddha, L. Ron, whoever. Hell, maybe I just need to thank me. If there's one thing I've learned through all my adventures and conquests, it's that some people are just wired for success. I had no choice when it came to being great. I just am great. I'm not trying to sound cocky or full of myself, but Kenny Powers has a sneaking suspicion that no matter what comes his way he will always be great. Because that's just the way shit works sometimes. This has been based on a true story. The motherfuckin' end. "

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