Wednesday, August 24, 2011

simon-cowell-early-v-necks

Why doesnt being rich have to make peopel so weird?

Simon Cowell's breakfast

Via With Leather
In addition to getting a weekly intravenous vitamin drip, Cowell’s last act every night is to text his executive assistant what time he wants his breakfast, which is prepared and brought to him by his housekeeper. Every day for the last five years, Cowell has had the same breakfast:
Hot water with lemon. Then papaya juice with lime… Then oatmeal. Then tea. Then three different smoothies—a spinach smoothie,¹ an antioxidant smoothie,² and a super smoothie with seven fruits.³

1. The specific recipes, as supplied by his assistant: 1 banana, 2 large handfuls of fresh young spinach, the juice of half a lemon, a small amount of freshly crushed ginger, a small glass of water, a tablespoon of honey, and 12 ice cubes, served in a tall glass with a black bendy straw.

2. One large carrot, 2 sticks of celery, 1 banana, 1 green apple, 25 green grapes, 3 slices of fresh ginger, 1 tablespoon of honey, 1 cup of orange juice, and 10 ice cubes.

3. One hundred twenty-six milliliters of grape juice, either red or green (30 grapes), 20 milliliters of blueberry puree (15 blueberries), 20 milliliters of strawberry puree (9 strawberries), 20 milliliters of apple puree (half an apple), 10 milliliters of lingonberry juice (8 lingonberries), 8 milliliters of acerola juice (5 acerola berries), and 8 milliliters of aronia juice (5 chokeberries). (Chokeberry is also a good word for a type of gay dude who just blows dudes.) 


5 Fucking years.  You would think being rich would lead to more variety. 


In related news, did you know sales tax in Chicago is 11%.  I know because when I get my breakfast off the dollar menu at McDonald's my bill is always $1.11, it used to be $2.22 but that was in better times. 


-Les Anderson

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